I'm not really sure what I expect to get out of this. I'm not even sure I'm supposed to get anything out of it...although I feel that people are rarely altruistic.
I never read these things. I don't expect anyone else to read this. But I need to vent, and to do so with a neat little background and pretty pictures to obviously highlight that which I write about rather than in my little black Moleskines is an interesting change.
Anyway. Me. I'm engaged, 25, and pretty fed up with life. I haven't always been this way, and perhaps that's what I plan on using this blog (...the word itself makes me shudder) for: to air out my demons. No, I wasn't abused as a child and no, I don't blame everyone else for my problems. I know my issues lie squarely within my own being; how I understand and process things, nurture-over-nature type thinking. Some days I see no problem with this (the lady who whacked me in the head with your heavy bag on the train this morning: this one's for you), but others (the crying baby on the same train. The commute this morning pretty much sucked) make me feel that I've become inhuman. I've used my displeasure with my life and my feeling of intellectual superiority over the tired, huddled masses as a crutch and allowed them to make me feel that everything is beneath me.
Woe is me. Instead of studying to get into grad school like I so desperately want to, I see everything as out to get me and surrender myself to the forces of fate and genetics.
But does it have to be this way...
